Feeling Hopeless and Broken

 Facing our challenges head-on!
Challenges Women Face

November 8, 2016

Dear Julie:

I have been in an off and on relationship for 10 years with someone I loved tremendously with everything I had in me. During one of our off times he got someone pregnant. I still continued to love him and that child. He has 2 children in a different state that I love and have a bond with as if they were my own.

Problem became that he continued to sleep with his child’s mother and she continued to spread her evilness by threats and manipulation by way of the child. She didn’t allow him to see his child when were together because she didn’t like the fact that he was with me so, as many women do, she used her child to control him and make his life and mine miserable. He has an addiction to pills and no matter how much I try to keep him clean and in God’s word, it doesn’t work because he’s weak to her and her drama of using the child.

I have been nothing but supportive, faithful and loyal to him and I now feel that he never loved me I was just a person that he could lean and depend on whenever it was at his convenience. He has now left me again for her and it’s left me to feel unwanted, unloved, rejected and less than because I don’t have his child.

My self-esteem is at an all time low and I fight depression everyday wearing a fake smile when it feels like I’m dying inside slowly everyday. I’ve never felt so stupid for putting up with this behavior and for giving someone 10yrs of my life that I can never get back. I cry almost every day because I still love him but I know I have to let go. He has chosen to be with his child’s mother and is nothing I can do about it but accept his decision. How do I truly let go and not think or focus on them and their happiness with each other. Thank you…Feeling Hopeless and Broken


Dear Feeling Hopeless and Broken:

Breathe the fresh air, dear girl. You are now free to find yourself again. This man was a sour influence on your life, dragging you down with all his issues. Accept his decision? I’d say rejoice that a way has opened for you to move forward with your life.

You have many talents and gifts that you have probably ignored in your efforts to keep this man on his feet. Your story makes me think a little bit of Hannah (book of I Samuel in the Bible). She felt inadequate because she didn’t have a child to love and her husband’s other woman held it over her head all the time, mocking her, flaunting her own children. Read about it in Chapter One of I Samuel. But you know what happened? Hannah finally had a child who became a great leader in Israel.

There are other men. Be patient and wait for God’s best for you. Be selective. You don’t want to waste any more time on men that are fickle and incapable of commitment. Pray that God will send you His choice this time, and don’t accept anyone else.

God bless you. Julie

Remember, friends, as challenges come our way, we can face them head-on
through Christ who strengthens us!

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