Ready to Move On

Facing our challenges head-on!Challenges Women Face

April 8, 2016

Dear Julie,

I was in a relationship for 6 & 1/2 years with someone who I honestly feel never loved me. I gave this man my all. And basically my all was never good enough for him. On our one year anniversary he proposed to me and I accepted. But we never got married. Something inside me kept telling me this isn’t right.

When I got pregnant with my daughter I found out he was on chat lines talking to women, going out to strip clubs, and doing things I never imagined he would do. But yet I stayed by his side. Yes, things weren’t all good but they weren’t all bad. But still I felt as if I was never enough.

Then my mom passed away and I had no one. He vowed to do right my me and the kids, yet he still found time to go out and talk to other women. I often question myself like why was I never enough for him? Why won’t this man love me for me? Why hasn’t he fought for me? Fought for us?

Then I get pregnant again, I’m thinking maybe he will change for the sake of the kids. Wrong! Now he is in a relationship with his co-worker buying her things and taking her out. But what about me? What about our family? Why won’t this man love me?

The co worker leaves him and now his heart is broken. Now he wants to come back home now he wants his family back. Now I don’t want him back. Why couldn’t he love me after every thing he put me through? Now that the co-worker used him and now she no longer needs him, now he wants to come home.

But I’m not sure what to do. I still love him but look at all he has done to me and my kids. When I met him, I had a daughter from a previous relationship. Now I have my daughter plus 2 kids from him, and now I’m raising my nephew. Raising 4 kids is hard. I’m by myself. He isn’t helping me with his children.

Now he has a new girlfriend. He taking her out buying her things and showing her off. Why wouldn’t this man love me? Why I didn’t get just- because gifts? Why wouldn’t he show me off? Why?

I want to forget him and cut him off altogether but it’s hard… Please help me Julie— Ready To Move On


Dear Ready to Move On:

Why wouldn’t he love you? Because he’s an unstable jerk. Put him behind you like a dirty shirt and move on. You deserve so much more–your kids deserve so much more.

Why wouldn’t he love you? Because you don’t appear to love yourself. Why would you put yourself and your kids through this over and over again? Take care of those kids, give them your love and attention.

You don’t mention God. Do you know Him? Have you asked Jesus to take control of your life? If you have, you are a child of the King. You deserve to be treated like a princess, and you should expect no less.

Your Father God expects you to hold your head up high and follow him along paths of righteousness. Your Father God is faithful. Readers of this column constantly sing His praises. Many of them have shared experiences very similar to yours and they credit God for leading them out of darkness into light.

I advise you to find a good Bible-believing church. Get serious about God and then let Him bring someone worthy of your love into your life, someone who will truly love you for who you are. And when that good man appears, don’t for one minute consider having any kind of sexual relationship with him until you have a wedding ring on your finger.

Think of who you are, think of your children. Do not repeat your past mistakes.

Readers, we welcome your thoughts and prayers.

God bless you,


Remember, friends, as challenges come our way,we can face them head-on
through Christ who strengthens us!

If you wish Bible-based advice for a challenge you face, leave a message in the Contact Me box (NOT below in the Comment box) and I’ll answer confidentially on this page. No one will see your photo or name or any other identifying information.


2 Responsesto “Ready to Move On”

  1. Lynn says:

    I’ve seen and heard of this guy so many times. Julie is on target. It is hard to leave an abusive relationship when you’re accustomed to the abuse but I know women who have, and over time, your life will change when you do.

  2. Julie Admin says:

    Thank you, Lynn. Your encouragement may be just what is needed for Ready to Move On to actually move on.

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